Monday, June 25, 2007

Ick Factor To the Nth Degree

Caught the latest entry in the "lets-humiliate-women" sweepstakes on TV.

Age vs. Love. Another reality show (and I use the term loosely--very loosely) in which a bachelor seeks true love from among a group of women who don't seem to mind sharing their guy with fifteen others. We all know the drill by now.

In this version, our bachelor is 30-year old tennis star Mark Phillipousis--an extremely charming, not to mention, HOT, guy.

The women? Here's where it gets ugly. (And I don't mean the women.)

In the first episode, the producers trot out six beautiful women, one by one. After the perfunctory peck on the cheek, the first one announces proudly, "I was born in 1967 which makes me 42."

Mark's face falls a bit.

Then, it gets worse. They're ALL over 40. Mark's face falls so far, a production assistant may have to come clean up the mess off the rooftop patio.

Clearly, this is NOT what the poor guy signed up for.

And yet...ever gracious, ever the trooper, he repeats the same mantra over and over: "Pleasure to meet you. Pleasure to meet you." When the 48-year old (who later, off camera, confesses to having a son Mark's age) reveals her age, his eyes widen in disbelief. "You look incredible," he says. For your age is what he means.

Naturally, the women have no problem with Mark's youth. Each believes he could be "the one." Little do they (or Mark) know that the producers have one more twist in store for everybody.

Yep. You guessed. Cue the 20-year olds.

They arrive in all their skimpy-clothed, toned & tanned, glory. The 25-year old (the one I'd like to kill first, if you don't mind) says: "I hope I'm not dating when I'm 40--y'know, all desperate for a man. I mean, how pathetic."

Gee, think it's pathetic at 40? Try 53.

At the close of episode one, Mark has dispatched one of the 40-year olds off to what we can only presume is spinsterhood. Then the host does the big reveal. "Your choices have just gotten a whole lot younger," he promises with a gleam in his eye. A curtain falls and there stand the youngsters, posed like hookers at a porn convention.

And...cue voiceover: "When the 40-year olds find out about the 20-year olds, the claws come out!"

Oh, goody. Just what women the world over can't wait for.

By the way, using numbers is a bit cumbersome, don't you agree? I guess that's why the Producers have coined these nicknames...The Kittens and the Cougars.

Guess which one is which.

P.S. I'd write more, but I gotta go run and watch episode two.

1 comment:

Carol B. said...

OMG, I don't think I could watch this. Just hearing you describe it is painful.

If you're gonna watch the darn thing, you better at least get a story idea from it.