Hope, Optimism and Britney Spears

I used to be a pretty carefree human being, never sweating the small stuff, always able to see the silver lining in a threatening cloud.

Then I hit 50.

Now, I worry about everything.

I thought of blogging on what keeps me awake at night, but what if anxiety is contagious? I sure don’t wanna be responsible for starting a panic epidemic (see-- something else to worry about). So, what’s the opposite of fear? How about hope?

I decided to focus on things I’m hopeful about. And I got to thinking about the difference between hope and optimism. To me, optimism implies a measure of expectation, whereas hope is, well…just hope. You can have hope without optimism, but not the reverse. Then I looked them both up in the dictionary and had to toss the whole idea. Turns out both imply an anticipated result. My theory sucked.

Plan B for today: Britney Spears and husband-of-the-month Kevin Federline announced their foray into reality show programming. Okay, putting aside for a moment last year’s goal to stay out of the limelight, does anybody but me think ol’ Brit needs a mentor before her flame is forever snuffed?

So, here ya go, Brit. As a public service, I’ve made a list of candidates you oughta take a meeting with:

1. Madonna—if anyone can turn your mediocre talent into a career with staying power, it’s the Material Girl

2. Jodie Foster—from child actress to mega-award winning star, Jodie could coach you on how to avoid the whole “man mess”

3. Debbie Gibson—hey, at least she’s working

4. Ozzie Osborne—Ozzie claims “The Osbornes” was the worst decision he every made; maybe you should listen

5. Dano Plato—oh, right. Not available. Sorry.

6. Farrah Fawcett—now, there’s a real role model for ya, Brit. Still going strong after all these years…oh, you say her son is doing a year-long rehab stint for heroin addiction? Hm. Let’s move on.

7. Tracy Lord—from porn to legitimacy; do you think she could be doing your career in reverse?

8. Courtney Love—if there’s anyone who’s got more firsthand knowledge on how to f**k up a life, I wanna know who it is. Oh, wait. We’re looking for experts on how not to do that.

You see? Lots of choices, and I could go on and on, but…gee--turns out I’ve got better things to do…

Hopefully, Britney will figure it out on her own, but I’m not optimistic. (See the way I brought the topic full circle?)